ALVIN AND THE CHIPMUNKS (2007)

Who's in It: Jason Lee, David Cross, Jane Lynch, the voices of Justin Long, Jesse McCartney, Matthew Gray Gubler

The Basics: It's an origin story, like the kind every comic-book superhero has, except that these are CG chipmunks. Alvin, Theodore and Simon find Dave Seville, a struggling songwriter, and together they become a famous singing group and teach each other the true meaning of family. Someone out there will hate it for that reason and assume it's part of the liberal media's agenda to promote nontraditional living arrangements as normal. But really, who's to say that adopting three digital rodents doesn't make you a dad? Not me.

What's the Deal? I've been dreading this for months now. Seriously, just wishing that all the prints would burn up in a fire. That was the marketing campaign's fault, dressing them in hoodies and making them look all gangsta. It's the Scarface-ification of children's pop culture, and it's just wrong. So anyway, the actual movie doesn't go in for much of this. They do update that dorky song "Witch Doctor" to be all Black Eyed Peas-ish, but beyond that, the worst thing that happens is that part in the trailer where one of them accidentally eats the other one's poop. Gross, yes, but kids will fall out laughing.